The Squeaky Wheel Gets The Grease

Isn't that what "they" say? I have been on the internet all weekend looking into the special education laws in my state. I am educating myself because I must. I must be an advocate for my son. It's what we as parents do. Well, it's what I do anyway. I feel the school was wrong in sooo many aspects of what went down the other day. Now I KNOW they were. I wrote emails over the weekend to various members of the school. I requested an emergency meeting. I requested a copy of Princes school records. I heard NOTHING today. That is UNTIL I wrote a letter to the State Department of Education and let them know that I know what Princes rights are and I did not want to have to go all legal on them if I didn't have to. Not to worry, I said it in a very professional way. I used the help of a very informed and helpful parent advocate. Unfortunately, she and many others have been in the same situation and have had to fight for their children's rights. I got an IMMEDIATE (20 minutes) response. A phone call from the woman who made the decision to remove my son from his new school.

I have my emergency meeting on Thursday and more importantly Prince CAN RETURN TO SCHOOL TOMORROW. This is a victory indeed. BUT, I still have a fight on my hands. I will have to convince them that he can succeed in their program albeit with accommodations that were agreed upon at a prior meeting with the new school. Prince needs to be on his BEST behavior when he returns. Or it is all for naught. I certainly hope not, but he is pretty excited to be going back. He has NEVER been excited about any aspect of school before. He has been asking me since this happened, "Mom, when can I go back." It's heartbreaking. Yea, he screwed up. He is a child with emotional disturbances. You'll have that. But he knows that this is it. If he truly wants this then he needs to act like it. I have been praying on it constantly.

I know they will be watching him like hawks. I pray that he can keep it together enough to pass their trials. It's not over though. His behavior until Thursday's meeting is a HUGE part of it. I have had the talk with him and he knows this. Then there is the meeting on Thursday, one in which we will determine what accommodations he will need and if they can provide them(by law they must, I know this cause Iz edu-muh-kat-did). There will be the determination by the administration whether or not they still want to send him to our local high school. But if they do decide this, they know Queenie ain't scerred and will fight them tooth and nail. Cause that's what kind of Mom I am. QUEEN......OUT

P.S. I am still sober(thank you God), when I am through fighting for my kids rights I will blog about that more!

So Let The Battle Begin

I had a PPT meeting at my princes new school on Friday. The first day of school was on Thursday. This meeting was scheduled a few weeks ago and at the time I thought *wow* they are really on the ball up there, wanting to get started on the right foot. I was excited to get to that meeting and get this chapter of his high school career started. Now by my last post you can see that my prince did not have the best of first days. Apparently there was an incident that included swearing. It was over quickly and prince regained his composure on his own and that was it. When prince got home he was GUSHING with excitement over his first day at school. You need to know that this has NEVER happened. He went on and on about everything he did and saw and about everything he wanted to accomplish. He was even saying how he wanted to stay after school and work out in the gym and start to get into shape. He was so excited and I was happy for him. School has been very difficult for him for as long as I can remember. The next morning he got up on his own, dressed and hit the street to catch his bus as I was just getting up for the day! He was THAT excited.

Cut to PPT meeting the following morning. I arrive at the school and am escorted down to the meeting room by the Special Ed Department head of the school. The door opens and there they all are. All of the administrators and-oh who is that over there, oh that would be MY SON. My bipolar, severely depressed w/anxiety disorder son. Greaaaaaaaat.


I should tell you that the student is always invited to join in these types of meetings. My son usually opts out. He later told me that he was not asked, he was just taken out of class and brought down there. We begin this meeting and I can tell that he does NOT want to be there. He started getting nasty and there was MORE swearing and he was pretty much removed and put in the next room.(with supervision). Prince does NOT DO WELL with strangers and especially when these strangers are gathered around a conference room table discussing HIM.

So to make a long story short, the administrators that were present in that meeting came to the conclusion that they were not equipped with the resources that my son needs and they recommend that he be sent back to our local high school. They did not even want him to finish that day. I had to take him home and TELL him that he was not welcome back. We both cried and he is crushed. I have been on suicide watch ever since. He said to me, "Mom , this was the best thing that ever happened to me and now I just want to die."

I had him write a letter of apology to the school for his behavior in the meeting. I have also requested an emergency PPT. I feel that they are discriminating against him because of his disability and I will fight for him. I am his mother and his advocate and will fight with all my might for him to be given a chance to prove that he can make it. I think that one day and 2 class periods is not enough of a chance to prove that he can indeed succeed in their school. Wish me luck in this battle. I am just sick over this and I have been reading up on his rights as a disabled individual and they are clearly in the wrong. I just hope I have what it takes to take them on. I'm going to try my damnedest. Queen....OUT

NOT a Good Sign

Day ONE: Email from the guidance counselor-

Today is the orientation I was telling you about yesterday. He will be touring with the same group all day, so the schedule won’t be a problem. If it is, he will be given a new copy. Prince did have trouble doing some of the group activities. He put his head down and when the teacher asked if he was okay he said (my words) that he was uncomfortable doing that type of activity. I gather there was some swearing. I went to meet Prince so he would know me before tomorrow’s meeting. He was not eager to talk to me, which is not surprising, and asked if he could go continue the tour with his group. When I saw him later he was talking to the teacher about a class and seemed okay.

Ms. Berube and I will see you for the PPT tomorrow. I look forward to meeting you. Let me know if you have any concerns.

Thanks,
Amber Stolz

Holy detention batman, its gonna be a loooooong year....

It's The Most WONDERFUL Time Of The Year

Well it IS for most parents. Today is the first day of high school for my prince. Yea that's what I'm going to call him from now on. He needed a nic and that is what it's gonna be. I just saw him get on the bus for his first day. He was actually in a GOOD mood. He was up and showered while I was still having nightmares of how horrific today will be. But then I woke up and saw that he was up and running and dressed in his new uniform and he gave me NO GRIEF whatsoever. Excuse muah for not being overly excited about this because I know all mornings will not be this good. BUT ITS A GOOD START! Especially for my boy. There truly IS a GOD. I have missed blogging, it's been over a week. I will check back in later and let y'all know how the day goes! QUEEN..........OUT

Back in My Castle

Yer Queen is back home from our mini vacay in Lake George. It was bootyful. They scenery was nice but my son was NOT. I hate to say it like that but dammit if I mouthed off and talked to my mother like he did to me I would be wearing my teeth on the back of my scull. We got our asses beat. Oh yea. And guess what? WE DESERVED IT! There were six children and I don't blame that woman (Mom) for whipping out the paddle when needed. But my friends, it is a new age. We are not allowed to "beat" our children these days. How do I know this? Oh, because MY SON TOLD ME SO! haha.

Son: "If you slap me then I'LL call the police!"
Me: "Here gimme that phone, I'll dial it for ya."
Son: "Nice."
Me: "Then when they get here they can take you away to the land of the foster children, you know the ones that live in a basement and have never heard of Pokemon or ice cream."

Son is only 13. Son is diagnosed clinically depressed with anxiety disorder. Oh AND he is bipolar. And he's 13! I know this is just the beginning of my hell. Oh, AND I am a recovering alcoholic and can't drink over it. DAMMIT.

TO BE CONTINUED: I have to go to the store and get devil child some fruit. There's no ice cream in this castle for misbehaving children. I am such a mean Mom.

Ok I'm back. I went to the store that I spent 8 hours working in today to get the above mentioned fruit and other odds and ends. Like yogurt - and wheat bread. Things that my son needs to get used to eating. He is on 3-going on 4-different meds. One of them makes him crave carbs. He eats NON-STOP. He is gaining weight like there's no tomorrow. So I need to be diligent about what I bring in this house for food. I have been buying healthier food since we got back. A lot of our arguments on vacay were over FOOD. He wanted it constantly. I feel for him. He really cannot help his appetite right now. I know it's driven by the frigging meds he is taking. But its FRUSTRATING to say the least.

Moving on. I received a call from the AA hotline tonight. Someone was in need. I am ashamed to say I ALMOST didn't answer it. I hesitated. Then I remembered that I gave the hotline my number to help another sick and suffering human being. Someone was there for me when I needed help. This is what we do. We pass it on. The last time I got a call from the hotline I ended up talking to someone who wanted me to be their personal driver to get to meetings. I'm pretty sure that's not what the hotline is intended for. So I answered it tonight and was given a number to call. A woman needed someone to talk to. She was drunk as a skunk. Big surprise there! I am going to call her in the morning and possibly pick her up for a meeting tomorrow evening.

She is someone who has been sober for different lengths (years) of time, but thought she could handle "controlled" drinking. Does that sound at all familiar to any of my alkie friends out in blogland? It sure sounded familiar to me! I spent 13 years "controlling" my drinking after my first attempt at sobriety (first rehab) before I finally got sober this time. Oh and what a grand 13 years it was. I had a few realtionships-one which was abusive (POS) I fell off a deck and broke my neck (drunk, of course!) had a baby, lost both parents and a sister, and somehow survived it all. I am grateful to be able to be here to tell you that I got past all that and then some. Lord knows I should have been dead a long time ago. But I am not. I am alive and well, thanks to the fellowship of AA. Oh, and God. QUEEN.....OUT

This and That

Wow I haven't written in a week and yet I don't have much to say. Hmmmm. Actually it's 2:39 am and I am packing for my trip to Lake George. The photo above shows the beauty I will be soaking in in just a few short hours! I should be sleeping but nooooooo. I am wide awake sweating my ass off smoking like a chimney doing laundry for the trip.

Its weird but my sister and I have been taking turns pulling all nighters. Sometimes its both of us. We just cannot sleep. The weather here JUST turned sticky and humid so that's not the problem. The evenings here have been perfect for sleeping until now.

I kinda sorta reconnected with one of POS sisters today. We have not communicated for about 5 years or so. At all. My son has been seeing her children at another aunts house. He asked me last night if he could go over their house and we set it up and I brought him over today. I ended up staying with him and we had a good time catching up. My only regret is that I did not officially make amends to her. There were kids everywhere and I never really got to speak to her alone. It really bothered me later that I did not make it a priority and "git er done". I will be sure to do it the next time I see her.

My sons sister has been posting wedding pics on her facebook page. The latest batch had a pic entitled "my family". I will give you ONE guess who was NOT INCLUDED in this lovely family photo. I am soooo glad my son does not have a facebook. Seeing this pic with my son excluded justified what I have been saying all along. They just don't give a rats ass about him. All the other players were in it. I am pretty much done with big sister. My son DID say to me " I don't think they want me to come over anymore". He is figuring it out on his own and I will help him deal with it as best I can. He has a mental illness and I think they just don't know (or don't want to)how to deal with it. They way they treat him you'd think he had think he had bubonic fucking plague.

So anywhooo.....I am going to go finish packing. jeNN if you want to hook up EMAIL ME DAMMIT. I think my email is on my profile. I will be back on Friday night. You all be good now. Have an awesome sober week, I know I'm gonna! QUEEN.......OUT

Post # 100

Well ladies and gentleman, I'd like to thank all my faithful followers and stalkers alike (ya- -I WISH) for hanging on with me as I ride this sometimes rocky journey of mine. Rocky as it is at times, it is a walk in the park compared to the old road I was on. I have enjoyed this online part of my recovery. I welcome all comments and opinions. It's amazing to me that some of the people like myself, who have been to hell and back through the years of abusing ourselves with alcohol and drugs, give the best advice you could ever get. It is greatly appreciated and I am so grateful that I have found this online recovery community.

What else am I grateful for?

I am grateful for the new attitude and new outlook I now have in life.

I am grateful for getting through last week without verbally or physically injuring former family members for the way that they treated my son.

I am grateful that I am FINALLY letting go some of that ANGER and RESENTMENT that I felt towards some people last week. OH ITS STILL THERE, but it lessens each and every day the more I pray for it to be lifted.

I am grateful that I had an awesome meeting at my home group tonight. GUESS WHO gets to lead the meeting for the next 3 months? Yours Truly.

I WAS NOT grateful for having to lead the meeting and did NOT want to attend tonight. HOWEVER, I was grateful once the meeting was over and it went without a hitch. WHEW.

Blast-O-Butter Popcorn.

I am grateful for the opportunity to be able to GO ON VACATION next week! We are heading to Lake George, NY. Any suggestions on good lodging would be welcomed and appreciated. Either that or I throw a dart at my monitor and that's where the Queen shall lay her head for the week.

I am grateful that you all didn't RUN FOR THE HILLS when you read the craziness in last weeks posts.

You all have a kick ass evening. I know I will. QUEEN......OUT

FYI-I hit spell check and they were NO MISSPELLINGS found. Maybe there IS hope for those old bruised and battered brain cells.