Tuesday, March 17, 2009

What's up in Queens World

It's almost beddie bye time but I thought I'd check in with all my alkies before I turn in. I bet you're THRILLED!

My son is doing MUCH better, thanks for all of your thoughts and prayers.....You all just amaze me with your love and comments and suggestions. The prayers have worked, and the med changes have certainly made a difference. Thank you God! I was really afraid, actually scared of my own kid-and that was an awful feeling. I often wonder if I am doing the right thing-with the meds and all, but seeing him in such a state was quite an eye-opener. I think we are all just wired differently and some of us need medication to function properly. Pretty simple it seems, but its really not. There are the side effects, the stigma, the sense of being or feeling different than your friends. We still have a lot of work ahead of us, but we are taking that a day at a time-much like my recovery. Thinking about it in small pieces like that makes it much easier to handle.

I went to my Beach House meeting tonight. It was awesome as usual. I have a friend there who is working on her 4th step and was so excited to let me know that her sponsor said when she is done with her 5th, she will be able to begin sponsoring. She is DYING to get her hands on me! HEHE. She knows I'm sponsor less at the moment and she wants Queenie in a bad way. LOL. How sick am I when sponsors seek to sponsor ME! I though it was supposed to be the other way around, but hey-I would gladly accept the help. She is right, I DO need a sponsor and I admire the way she is working HER program. I know that if I don't begin some serious step work I will be in some deep doo-doo. I don't look good in doo-doo so Step work it is.

Mr Jackass received his 10 year medallion tonight. Whoopdie-fuckin-doo. He was so ungracious that I coulda just reached over and slapped the shit outta him. BUT I did not, I congratulated him when it was my turn to share. I hope it sounded sincere, but it didn't feel like it when I said it. He is just a miserable fuck and I need to accept that and get over it. I was told to pray for him, so I suppose I could try that.

OK-Gratitude list and then Nitey nite:

  • I have an awesome kid, I can't imagine life without him

  • I have a job, car and roof over our heads

  • I have genuine friends

  • I have a house full of yummy food, which I am enjoying too much lately!

  • I have the coolest blogger buddies on the planet

  • Its almost spring-yeehaw

  • I am going on a road trip with my drunks Thursday night, to a treatment center-carrying the message rocks

  • My Higher Power

  • my Family

  • My new dew

  • bills are paid!

  • My warm blankie, which I am gonna go crawl under!

Night all, sweet dreams!! Queen....OUT


big Jenn said...

I just LOVE reading your blog! It makes me feel like there are real people out there in cyberspace. Not a bunch of oh-so-profound and aren't I just THE MOST WELL recovering human being. Know what I mean. I think you do. Rock on girlfriend and keep posting!jeNN

Queenneenee said...

yes, I am definetly a WORK IN PROGRESS. lol

Cat said...

Great list of gratitudes - that always helps me stay grounded when I do that! You sound really good!

sober white women said...

I have to agree with big Jenn. I like blog that keep it real. I know that's what I try to do. I can relate to people who are real and don't try to sugar coat everything.