OK, I'm telling-on myself

So I am off from work today, I was off yesterday as well. I bet you think I got a lot done. You would be WRONG! I bummed out all day yesterday, got NOTHING done that I needed to do. There, I ratted myself out. I am hoping that this will help me in getting some stuff done today.
Here are some things that I MUST DO TODAY:

1. Get the oil changed in my car. The place is half a mile down the road, it takes what 10 minutes at these quick oil change places right? Maybe when my car finally starts spittin' and sputterin' I will finally go down there and give it what it needs so I will have a nice healthy car to get my lazy ass from point A to B? NO, GET OFF YOUR ASS DENISE.
2. Get massive amounts of laundry done, hell I don't even have to leave the comfort of my home to get this one done. It is just so OVERWHELMING at times! I have lots to do, most of which I need to donate to Goodwill. I have clutter on top of clutter that will go away permanently if I put a dent in this today. GET OFF YOUR DEAD ASS DENISE.
3. Get rid of my old TV. At the moment I have two very LARGE televisions in my living room. I gifted myself a 46" LCD recently and my old 37" is still here-haunting me.
   Its sits behind the new TV taunting me as if to say "screw you and your new set, I weigh about 200 lbs and you will NEVER get me outta here by yourself, NEVER" NO REALLY DENISE GET OFF YOUR DEAD ASS.
4. Get the friggin Christmas tree up. I cannot do this until I accomplish #3. I purchased a tv stand/table thingy to put the new TV on and cannot assemble (yes assemble) it until Mr Zenith goes bye bye. STILL WAITING - IS YOUR ASS ASLEEP, OR WHAT?
5. Buy my son a book bag/backpack. His "broke" yesterday and I sent him off to school with the broken one hanging from one shoulder ghetto style-promising to get him a new one today. C'MON DENISE-ITS A BACKPACK-GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS-LIKE NOW

I think that's enough to expect of my self to get done today. I thought maybe writing it down would help me get motivated. Hell its working already, I have a load of blankets washing as we speak. I remember a counselor in an alcohol treatment center telling me to set goals, but don't set them too high. Instead of saying "I'm going to clean this house today" say I will clean a certain part of it today. Like the kitchen. Just the kitchen. But I tend to start in the kitchen and then next thing you know I am scrubbing the toilet, or worse I am on the computer! HAHA. I am easily distracted to say the least. When, oh when, are these brain cells going to rejuvenate-if then even will? My poor brain.

Even with my brain a mess, my house a mess, too many things to get done....I am still a sober alcoholic. None of this "unmanageability" I have in my life comes close to the "unmanageability" I had when I was out there drinkin my life away. I'm just lazy now lol. Ok here goes nuthin', I am off to Jiffy Lube. Here I go-GETTIN' OFF MY DEAD ASS.